Fish Overboard!

I thought people subsisting on only one food was some sort of myth. Namely because any one-fooders were typically actually one-food category-ers. Like "junk food" food people. Or "fast food" people. At least with those types, they're eating their hamburgers both with cheese AND without. I went to the dollar store tonight (ahem--the 99-Cent Store) to see what there was to see. I generally avoid the grocery aisles in such stores, because when deli meats cost only a dollar, and so does some tasty off-brand factory-made and supposedly edible cardboard chips, I start to wonder what exactly those animals looked like before they were made into lunch meat.

So while I was standing in line to check out at the lone register, I eavesdropped into the carts and hands and baskets of my fellow shoppers. The guy in front of me was purchasing hair care products. And lotion. The lady in front of him was buying some paper and art supplies for elementary schoolers. I had my little smell-good air freshener. And then there was the guy behind me. He was purchasing only one product. In bulk. Without the fancy Costco packaging.

One look into his basket was enough for me to want to leap over the register and hide. The entire bottom of his shopping cart was lined with boxes of sardines. A SHOPPING CART FULL OF SARDINES. All lined up neat and tidy, and in such density that I could practically smell them through both their tin containers AND their individual cardboard boxes.

I tried, and failed, to be sensitive toward this very portly gentleman. But I simply cannot fathom someone being allergic to every single food known to man with the exception of tiny fish soaked in olive oil. Granted, I don't even like sardines. But he's probably the only person on the planet who eats them three meals a day, 3,650 days per decade. Heck, just looking at them made me swear to myself that I would never again eat those icky sardines, regardless of the fact that I had no intention of ever eating them anyway.