Though I am the first to admit that I'm not in the least bit conceited, thanks to Mame, I came across an amazing website. Indeed, it's the Advertising Slogan Generator! After seeing some of the slogans this astounding generator created, I decided to do a post about various ways to sell myself. And since I'm not exactly the cleverest of advertisers (especially when I have to sell myself--let's just say resumes aren't exactly my forte), I let the generator do all the work.

That's right, what follows is a series of ads aimed at selling one product: me. Well, at least my blog. Okay, here goes: 25 ads a la me. Sloganize!

1. See the Phil, Feel the Shine.

This one seems sensible. It caters to my charming personality and contagious sense of humor and wonder. Yeah, right.

2. A Different Kind Of Company. A Different Kind Of All Things Phil.

Sometimes the best advertising slogans are the most obvious ones. I always like to do new things on my blog, it's just what I do.

3. Wear All Things Phil.

Well, I had never considered a clothing line. If I turned my wardrobe into a clothing store, I bet the only person who would shop there is me.

4. Nobody Does It Like All Things Phil.

Truer words were never spoken. Sure, I suppose a part of me would be flattered if someone was to copy my style, but I'm way too competitive to let anyone actually get away with it. Consider yourself warned.

5. Top Breeders Recommend All Things Phil.

I'm not exactly sure why breeders would be recommending me, but there's nothing wrong with another endorsement. I won't complain.

6. Don't Be Vague. Ask for All Things Phil.

This is not only a good slogan, it's wonderful advice. I suggest making it words to live by. You'll never go wrong.

7. If You Can't Beat All Things Phil, Join All Things Phil.

I must admit I really like this business philosophy. It caters to my competitive nature, but also to my more amiable side. It's like the best of both worlds.

8. You Like All Things Phil. All Things Phil Likes You.

It's a win-win situation. Need I say more?

9. Grab Life by the All Things Phil.

This one's for those of you sports fans out there. See? I appeal to a wide variety of people.

10. The Lion Goes from All Things Phil to All Things Phil.

I'm not entirely sure what this one means, exactly. But the lion starts and ends with me, so I'm fairly certain that's a good thing. Right?

11. Four out of Five Dentists Recommend All Things Phil.

Considering I'm neither toothpaste, toothbrush, or mouthwash, I'll take this one as a compliment. I'm fairly certain five out five dentists recommend me, but in the world of advertising, the only way to beat the competition is to appear humble. I think it works.

12. What's In Your All Things Phil?

A worthy question, to be sure. And something that I'd actually be curious enough to wonder about.

13. All Things Phil Tested, Mother Approved.

That right there should immediately make you cast away all doubts and throw inhibition to the wind. You know you want to.

14. I'm a Secret All Things Phil Drinker.

This one is obviously for my line of beverages, of which there is of course both alcoholic and non-alcoholic. I keep everyone's best interests at heart.

15. An All Things Phil A Day Helps You Work, Rest and Play.

It's clinically proven, too. Trust me.

16. The Too Good to Hurry All Things Phil.

By nature, I'm very laid-back, easy-going, and all-around chill. Turns out the same goes for my blog entries. So sit back, sip your ice-cold beverage on a hot summer day, and enjoy reading All Things Phil.

17. Things Go Better with All Things Phil.

I think this one might become the eighth wonder of the world.

18. Turn Loose the All Things Phil.

I'm not quite sure to whom this one is directed, but I think it's pretty darn good anyway.

19. Better Living Through All Things Phil.

I like this one because it is so full of hope. Heck, it even makes me feel good.

20. See the Face You Love Light Up With All Things Phil.

It really helps that I tend to have some form of grin on my face all the time. Smile!

21. It Could Be All Things Phil.

I assume this one refers to some level of nirvana, or something.

22. All Things Phil - It Does a Body Good.

Of course I have to endorse drinking milk, not only for stronger bones, but also to help fight osteoporosis. The yellower your bones, the healthier (that's a true scientific fact, by the way).

23. The All Things Phil Of Paradise.

There really isn't any other kind, to be honest.

24. You've Got Questions. We've Got Yo Phil.

That's right, never forget your one-stop destination for advice on practically anything and everything.

And finally...

25. When You've Got All Things Phil, Flaunt It.

A particularly good piece of advice. Be proud!