To wrap up my notes regarding my recent road trip adventure (also chronicled here and there), I end with an interesting true story. If you've ever taken a road trip (if you haven't, stop everything and go on one immediately), you're already well aware that the long hours spent on the road inevitably consist of periodic stops to use the restroom.

Quite often, gas stations prove to be convenient spots to stop. For one thing, there's gas. Second, there's food and drink available. And most times, there's restrooms to use.

While some of these gas stations are of the simple, ordinary, everyday variety, others are not mere gas stations. They're truck stops. Replete with down home cookin', diesel gasoline, and an unusual array of products for sale, including (but not limited to) electronic equipment, cassette audio tapes, movies, food, newspapers, etc.

It is at one such place that this story takes place. I groggily enter the truck stop, tired after having been napping in the car while my brother drove. I stumbled in and quickly found my way to the men's room. Cut to when I'm washing my hands, about to make my exit. As I scrub my hands, a truck driver walks in. Nothing out of the ordinary, right?

Wrong. Attached to this man's ear was antiquated blue tooth headset (the headset contained a black cord that connected to the cell phone). Apparently, the man was having a conversation on the phone. Sadly, I've encountered people who use the phone while they're taking care of business. So this, at least, was old news.

But never have I heard anyone say the following:

"I'm in the bathroom. I'll give you ten guesses about what I'm doing. No man, I'm in the bathroom. Yes. Uh huh. I'll give you ten guesses about what I was doing when you called. No, really. Yes. No shit, man, I'm taking a piss. Yeah. Ten guesses, I said..."

Yeah. That's the first time I've heard anyone actually advertise to the person they're talking to where they are and what they're doing. I would have thought the echo of his voice, thanks to all the tile in the place, would have given him away. But apparently not, considering how many times he repeated himself.

As appalling as this is, I find myself wishing that I could have heard the other end of the line, just so I could hear the person's reaction. And now for a poll, not so much to glean some information from you, but because I haven't done one of these in a while.


Have you ever seen someone in the bathroom talking on the phone? (results shown in parentheses)

-Yes, of course! It's waaaay common. (5)
-Heck no! No one would ever do that, it's just gross. (2)
-Yeah, and I've secretly wished that their phone fell into the toilet. (12)